Is it better to give a gift or receive one? The answer depends on who you ask and their circumstances. In a time of need, you may need help that you are unable to provide for yourself. In that case, receive a gift given.

It is easier to give a gift, however. The act of giving does something inside of us to which nothing else can compare. This, of course, assumes that you are an altruistic (unselfish, giving-natured) person.

Selfish, self-interested people (aka, narcissists) need not apply. They will likely never know the satisfaction of making someone else happy without a motive attached. Most of them are either incapable of such a feeling or unwilling to do anything to achieve it … or both.

Now, let’s change our perspective. Most Believers ask God for things. Good so far. Some go further and expect Him to give them whatever they want and make their lives what they want them to be, then hold Him personally responsible when their expectations are not met.

What does this sound like to you? To me, it sounds like the behavior of a narcissist. What do you think?

For such a one, it is all about them with no regard for anyone else. “Give me what I want, or I’ll make you regret it,” is a narc’s attitude. If you have ever held a position in ministry that involved counseling people, you may have discovered that most Believers behave narcissistically toward God.

I say this because you will hear them beg, cry, whine, threaten, blame, and attempt to manipulate God to get what they want without even a thought of what He desires or needs. And, yes, God has needs. Does that surprise you?

His needs are not like ours, so do not misunderstand that statement. Though infinitely self-sufficient, God expresses desires. A need is often the root of a desire. And an unmet need can result in pain.

Read in the Old Testament, and you will discover that God feels love, joy, grief, disappointment, and rejection. He speaks of holding His hands out all day long to a rebellious and obstinate people and talks about how they rejected Him. You can hear the pain He feels.

In the New Testament, Jesus weeps over Jerusalem because He desired to gather them and protect them and they rejected Him. This is the epitome of love and grief. Do you think He felt emotional pain? OF COURSE! We can be sure He did because we feel it when we are rejected–and His emotions are imprinted within us.

Then GOD said: “Here’s what I want you to do: Climb into the hills and cut some timber. Bring it down and rebuild the Temple. Do it just for me. Honor me. (Hag 1:8 MSG)

In today’s Scripture passage, God speaking through Haggai asks the people to do something, “just for Me”, to honor Him. Have you ever done anything for God just for Him, just to bring Him joy, just to bring Him a smile, and not with a motive of getting something in return? Have you? Ever?

Some people have difficulty thinking of God in such a personal way. This should not be because our relationship with Him IS personal–or at least should be. When people are in a relationship with each other, they sometimes do things for each other “just because”. I experienced this a few weeks ago.

My birthday was last month. My incredible wife planned a surprise party “just for me”. FYI: While it’s difficult to get something over on me, she did it flawlessly! Friends flew in from as far as Michigan. A friend who owns a great restaurant in Birmingham was in on it too and helped her “set me up”.

I walked in without a clue and experienced the greatest surprise of my life. I was speechless–a very rare occurrence! In my seventy years, I have never had a surprise birthday party. In my abusive history, birthdays and holidays ended regrettably. Karen has gone out of her way to change that expectation. (She has succeeded.)

I caught myself looking around the room in one of the most surreal moments I have ever experienced, realizing that those people were there because of me. I really didn’t know what to do with the feeling. I do not think I have ever felt so loved (with the sole exception of in my relationship with Karen).

She did it just for me, just because she loved me. The thought that I could do something that would cause God to feel that way is … overwhelming.

So, let me ask you: Do you love God that way? Do you want to? You can. Begin by taking small steps. Ask Him today, “What can I do for You today to bring You joy?” Do it just for Him. No expectation. No motive. No grand gesture. Just an expression of your love for Him. Just for Him. Just because.